Job interview questions

Here are the "right" answers to the worst questions:

• Have you ever brought a lawsuit against an employer? "No, but I’m always open to new experiences."

• Are you planning on having kids? "With you?"

• What interests you about our company? “Um, I heard you were hiring?”

• Can you work under pressure? “If I don’t get this job I’ll lose my house, my wife, and the eight third-world children I’ve been supporting will be doomed to starvation. How’m I doing so far?”

• How do you define sexual harrassment? “Come closer and I’ll show you.”

• Do you ever abuse alcohol or drugs? “I didn’t realize I had to choose”

• What is your biggest weakness? “I have two” ... “one, I have an aversion to kryptonite but it doesn’t normally affect my work, and two, you really don’t want me to work overtime during a full moon. Seriously.”

• Where do you see yourself in five years? “In mirrors and on YouTube. Unless I’m undead; then only on YouTube.”

• We like to consider ourselves an 'open' company who celebrates diversity, tell me about a time you've experience diversity in the workplace? "Well there was this time I called an Asian co-worker a chink and later I realized she was Korean. Boy did I feel silly and we all had a good laugh afterward. Did you know Asians really like photography equipment?"

• If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be? "I have a redwood in my pants. Does that count?"

• What is the airspeed of an unladen swallow? "African or European?

• Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Peter - family guy:Thinking: "Don't say doing you wife, don't say doing your wife" Says: "Doing you... son?" or 'Celebrating the fifth year anniversary of you asking me that question.'

• What do you think you can bring to the company? "Drugs?"

You can't really prepare. Do your best and live with it!

Alive and well

I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it. - Rita Mae Brown

Telovadba #89

• Jutranje radosti
• Piramida štemanja za tricepse (z obrati)
• Piramida štemanja za bicepse (z obrati)
• Matranje 7,1/10
• Počutje: Plezanje na rimcu in v Vipavi pomaga.

Want to last longer?

• Here are some interesting tips I found here. Ironically I also found out that best intercourse lasts from 7 to 13 minutes. Confused? Or are magazines trying to sell us an ideal again?

1. Master masturbation.Masturbate with a woman's orgasm in mind, not your own. In other words, take your time: Work up to 15 minutes. Bring yourself close to the point of no return, but don't let yourself ejaculate until time is up.
2. Squeeze.If you're overheating during sex, stop and squeeze right below the head of your penis, focusing the pressure on the urethra — the tube running along the underside of the penis. This pushes blood out of the penis and momentarily represses the ejaculatory response.
3. Pinpoint ejaculatory inevitability. The process of sexual response has four phases: excitement, plateau, orgasm, and resolution. The trick is to recognize the spectrum of feelings throughout the process. Rate your sexual excitement on a scale of 1 to 10. Try keeping yourself at 7.
4. Sexercise. A Kegel is an exercise that helps tighten muscles responsible for ejaculatory control. Become familiar with them by cutting off the flow of urine and then starting and stopping it repeatedly. Once you have the exercise down, practice your Kegels anywhere: at your desk, behind the wheel. Tighten your muscles and hold for a count of 10, then release.
5. Press, don't thrust. Press the end of your penis into her clitoral head. Linger in her vaginal entrance, where the most sensitive nerve endings are. When you do have intercourse, focus on small, shallow movements that penetrate the first 2 to 3 inches of her vagina.
6. Show a little courtesy. Ladies first, gentlemen — and we're talking about more than just holding the door open. When you help her have an orgasm first, it relieves you of some of the pressure to please and the psychological anxiety that feeds into PE.
7. Ask your doctor about Prozac. A recent study showed that 73 percent of men who suffered from premature ejaculation either were cured or improved after taking 20 milligrams of Prozac a day for a week and 40 mg thereafter.
8. Go for a second round. Shrug off an early emission with some extra attention to her arousal (yes, it means staying awake), then getting back in the saddle. Most men last much longer the second time around. And the more you practice, the longer that first time will last.
9. Let her climb on. When she's on top, your penis is less stimulated. And ask her to go slowly — long and fast thrusting is hazardous to a man's endurance.
10. Stop thinking of your orgasm. The area of the brain responsible for triggering orgasm is engaged whether you're trying to have one or halt one. The more attention you give it, the more likely it is to arrive. Focus on what's happening now — her silky thighs on your hips, say — and you'll diffuse pleasure throughout your whole body.

• Note to myself - if you are reading this at the age of 80, remember how good sex felt when it was all natural and lasted a long time.

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Nature making its April Fool!

Woke up at 5:15 AM. There was a mosquito buzzing around my ears. Got up and opened the window to let the cool air inside. It worked..ish.