Are too many COMPLIMENTS possible?

Have you ever gotten a totally unexcepted, honest compliment? How did it make you feel? Is it possible that you could remember it hours later and still felt great?

The answers to the questions above were probably mostly positive. What about this one: Do you feel good if other around you feel good? Why?

Now I am going to stop making you feel like you are on an interview and tell you that I think people give compliments because: 1. it makes them feel good when they see others feel good because of their actions 2. or because they have a hidden agenda. By that I mean, that they want something from another person and the reason for giving compliment is to give a person something, but expect something in return. Quid pro quo, with other person not knowing that consciously.

I have nothing against honest compliments, in fact I belive that we should all ( especially men :) ) develop a habit of actually saying it when we see or like something and shouldn't be affraid of looking weak if we do. It is a win win situation if the compliment is honest and is not meant to manipulate, beacuse it gives pleasure to both. Few examples: I like your haircut. Nice shoes ( no don't add the wanna fuck part :) ). You are really shiny today. Excelent idea. Nice shirt. Nice work...

On the other hand, I hate it when I see that someone is saying something because he wants to manipulate me into getting something from me. And it makes me furious when I see that someone is doing that to such an extent that it is done unconsciouslly. You probably agree with me that you see a person who does something like that in a totally different, negative light. But interestingly enough I have seen many men do exactly this kind of manipulation when they are trying to get a girl to like them: You are really beautiful, I really like your (stupid) friends, your new necklace is too die for and it really matches your shiny angel eyes... 'juck'. In my view all that suggary, slimey compliments have a very simple and manipulative goal. And while they might work in teenage and low self esteem situations, I belive they should be avoided at all costs. Many men learn the hard way that women quickly see their unconscious manipulation and act accordingly.

Don't forgget this is only one of the situations when we are sometimes subconsciously tempted to manipulate with compliments. Ex. : Boss I like your sporty car... :)

No, there are never too many compliments as long as they are honest and not used in an attempt to manipulate others.