Sex tip n.1

1. If everyone, even priests, can give sex tips, why can't I make fun of them? Plus add some words of wisdom.

1. So my first sex tip is going to be called:

Chill and reviving ecstasy

1. If you had sex (with someone!), and if you don't have a dick, then you probably realised that without "eating the sausage", there is no "ridding the sausage". It is one of the life truths which can't be avoided many times = there usually is no next time!
2. So now that you have accepted this fact, why not make it as good as possible for both you and the lucky fella?
3. So when you prepare for your next sheet shredding adventure, make sure to add a nice chill beverage to your usual accessories ( whips, baby lotion, chocolate, fuck towels, condoms, barbie toys...). Personally I recommend Guinness, because of its depth, softness and smoothness. But if you are a patriot, even the national stuff will do. Although don't be surprised if it is a bit sour, rough and well, can cause occasional burps.
4. Just to make extra sure I am clear, here are the most important points:
5. 1. undress him and yourself 2. pass him the chilled can/bottle to open it (remember, you want him to fell like a man, for after this foreplay!) 3. take a sip of the beverage, but don't over do it, because you need some space left right? 4. start sucking, and make sure you mutter along, when he starts his song of joy. 5. Make sure the beverage doesn't come out of your mouth (or nose) again. = you swallow.